


stars, i've seen them fall

by milkteeth



Category: West Wing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-08-17
Updated: 2012-08-17
Packaged: 2017-11-12 08:07:51
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 889
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/488609
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/milkteeth/pseuds/milkteeth
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>As it turns out, the whole staying at the same hotel thing doesn’t begin and end with Cedar Rapids, Iowa. It happens a lot.  (Kind of AU after 6.13, King Corn)</p>
            </blockquote>





	stars, i've seen them fall

As it turns out, the whole staying at the same hotel thing doesn’t begin and end with Cedar Rapids, Iowa. It happens a lot.

In Ann Arbor, Michigan he runs into her in the lobby of the Marriot and they go through the motions. Smile politely, say hello. They still don’t talk on the lift ride up and they always end up on the same floor. He can only laugh bitterly at the irony of it and catalog the pajamas she wears, running into her early mornings or late nights, only half aware he’s even doing it.

Six more stops along the campaign trail it happens, three more times he almost knocks on her door and doesn’t. One time he gets so close as to rest his knuckles against the blue painted wood before sighing and turning back to his room.

 

 

She doesn’t offer to help him with his room key anymore.

 

 

***

 

 

It all comes to a head in Minnesota. They’re high coming off their success in Arizona, the numbers finally seeming to go their way. Josh is a little drunk off the beers he shared with Santos before heading up to his room and with all the drunken-confidence of an idiot he finally braves the knock on Donna’s door. She takes her time getting to the door and when she opens it she’s wearing that pajama shirt with the little blue stars on it and these wrinkled grey shorts and god he just wants to kiss her. She blinks up at him expectantly and he realises he doesn’t really have a plan for what comes next so he stumbles with a ‘hey’. She doesn’t say anything, doesn’t even smile and he hates this. He hates it more than anything and he keeps screwing it up.

“Donna, I-“ he starts but he can’t find the words and he ends up watching her instead until she ducks her head and scrapes her hair behind her ear.

 

“Goodnight, Josh.” She says quietly, and she shuts the door before he can even register what’s happening.

 

“No, wait.” He says, but it’s too soft or she’s already gone back to bed because the door doesn’t open again.

 

 

***

 

 

He spends the next day half avoiding her, half hoping her runs into her between helping Ronna organize Santos’ schedule for the month. When he catches her in the elevator (again, again) as they’re heading up for the night he decides to just screw it all and say something. “I, look I’m sorry about last night.”  
She tenses visibly next to him but smiles awkwardly and swallows before nodding “sure, it’s- it’s fine.”  
The rest of the ride up is silent and he wrestles with his conscience as they walk to their rooms, desperately trying to control the part of him that wants to just reach out and touch her like he’s been starved of any physical contact for weeks.

“Well, night.” She says as she slides the room key into the door and it buzzes open. He’s about to murmur a similar reply but he stops.

 

“N-no.” He stammers and turns around. “No. God Donna this is…” He trails off. Her face is blank, staring straight at him and he can’t even read her anymore. He just wants to talk to her and tell her about his day and have her argue with him about the state of the country and the stupid decisions he makes and he can’t. He opens his mouth again, about to speak but she does instead.

 

“What do you want from me, Josh?” Her gaze is cast to the ground and she spits the words out. Silence swallows the air around them and all Josh can do is stand stock still in surprise.

 

“You can’t even answer that, can you? You don’t even know what you want from me. You want answers? You want me to tell you why I quit being your assistant after 6 years of working for you and getting nowhere?” She’s angry now, the rage building up inside her, heat running through her, spurring her on. “God knows I’m grateful for every opportunity you gave me, Josh. I never would’ve been where I am today if it wasn’t for you but you couldn’t keep expecting me to be your assistant forever. I’m better than that Josh, you know I’m better than that- god C.J knows I’m better than that.”

 

“C.J-?”

 

“I mean nothing changed with you, ever. I went into work every day telling myself ‘today’s going to be different, Donna’ and it was always the same and there was Joey and Amy and even after that none of it changed. God you almost died. I almost died and it was always the same and I couldn’t be there anymore just sitting at my desk outside your office while the whole time-“  
She stops to take a breath, hands clenched into fists at her side and she won’t look at him properly.

“Donna I don’t-“ he stutters, can’t figure the words. “What do you want me to say? Tell me what you want me to say.”

“Nothing.” She murmurs, finally looks at him. Her voice is even when she tells him, “I can’t do this anymore”, before turning back to her room and closing the door quietly behind her.

 

 

***

 

 

They don’t do this anymore.


End file.
